Kristen Rzasa

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Leave the gun take the cannoli…. OR

Blog Post

31 Mar
How about leave the guilt, take the help?

This week at our Happiness Project Book Club, there was some discussion about asking for, and accepting, help.  As women, we often find this to be a challenge.  I know I do. When we do accept help, it seems to be accompanied by a nice dose of guilt.  

For almost a year now, I have been battling painful bursitis.  My doctor recommends that I have rest periods between workouts, so that my body  has time to recover.   Have I been heeding that advice? Uh, no!   I continue to teach doubles at least twice a week and sometimes even triples.   I’m completely ignoring my own mantra of ‘listen to your body.’  We’re short staffed, it’s my business after all, and I don’t want to impose…..are just some of my excuses.
Lately I’ve had associates who have been more than willing to teach my Wednesday night time slot in order to help out.  WHY do I even debate it with myself?   Why not leave the guilt, accept the help? 
Another example is an annual get together with girlfriends that I’m hosting tomorrow.  Every one of them has offered to bring something.   “Oh no, I wouldn’t want you to go to any trouble, just bring yourself,” I hear myself saying.   STOP!  Just accept the help and move on!
In our book club discussion we talked about how by refusing help, we actually deprive the other person of the opportunity to do something positive. 
This is the lesson I’m currently working on. I graciously accept the offers for coverage for my Wednesday night class (even asking  for help on some weeks).  Slowly, I’m creating a schedule that works for me physically.   And I’m happy to report that a friend is making a batch of sangria for tomorrow night, while another is bringing a fruit salad. 
It will be a process to get good at this, but I’m not going to look back.  I’m leaving the guilt behind, accepting help, and maybe even picking up some cannolis for tomorrow night.
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